By Val Gayes

A few days ago, on social media, I spotted a question that made me squirm: "How do we get the perfect balance during each and every day?”

Perfection.

All the time.

Sure, I was being too literal in how I read this one sentence. Its author, like the rest of us, was just trying to get some tips on how to cope and look after themselves in the midst of “all this”. But it got me thinking how when we strive for perfection we always fall short. As a recovering perfectionist I have often thought that we will get things perfect by doing more, by lining up the perfect schedule of appropriate activities for ourselves and our loved ones.

"It seems that perfection is attained not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to subtract.” Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Now Saint-Exupéry was talking about designing planes when he wrote this, but it could easily apply to how we design our lives. How about doing less? How about becoming great at slacking, at dropping our expectations, at lining up with what is happening right now? How about including rest - deep rest - into our timetables? 

I’ve been taking lessons in dodging tasks and am becoming quite the expert at cutting corners. What I’ve noticed is that as I allow myself to become an underachiever in areas that don’t matter, I have become a lot less exigent with other people too. Things become easier. In giving myself more room to breathe, I give others more room to breathe too. 

Where could you let go of the need for perfection?

Val is a life coach and guides people to follow their joy valgayes.com

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